Wednesday

So my white blood cell count is going back up slowly.  It's up over three.  Low normal is 5.  The surgeon said she was going to give me lot's of  antibiotics.

I got word yesterday that I was once again approved for state benefits which is a very good thing.  I filled out the forms for state disability yesterday.  I'm not sure how that will go.  I need to be approved for disability if my ostomy supplies are going to be covered so I hope that goes well.

If you'd like to help go to my donate page at http://coloncancerfund.schuylermeyers.com and donate a couple of bucks.  Or just think good thoughts for me.

thanks


funds for my healing
mostly but not quite all there
the kindness of my friends

Tuesday

well, it seems I've been wound a bit tight lately.  I watched "Strictly Sexual" on Hulu last night and just cried at the end.  I mean I usually tear up a little at a lot of things but I just opened up last night.  Actually felt pretty good afterwards.  

I was at the Dempsey Center at CMMC yesterday while I was waiting for a ride.  Among the things I found in their library was a book called Finding the Money.  Among other things it said that I was going to have to fill out a series of long and tedious forms.  Boy ain't that the truth.  I'm not a big fan of forms.

but there it is.

Doctors doing well
They do their best to help me
mostly up to me

update

so another thing causing me some concern is wearing an ileostomy bag.  I searched the net yesterday looking for someone that said don't worry it's a piece of cake.  I found someone but it seems that there are a fair amount of people who had some probs with theirs.  Course I stopped looking after I found the positive one.

feel free to leave any thoughts on ostomy bags.

monday

The week starts again and I am closer to my surgery. I have a bunch of forms to fill out for disability today. I hate filling out forms. I'm not sure why. I just do.

winter is still here
its white cold grip is on me
my feet are chilly

sunday late morning

Saw my son at the lake yesterday.  It was really great to see him.  That just doesn't happen enough.  I am reminded of the song cat's cradle and I fear what may happen but I do what I can and hope for the best.  Turns out a lot of Harry Chapin's songs touch me.  I don't think I'm really alone in that.

Also went to an awesome party last night.  Boy that doesn't happen often.  Course if it did I guess I wouldn't appreciate it.  Good food, neat people, lasted just the right amount of time.

Slept til 9:30 or maybe later.  That doesn't happen much.  It's a beautiful thing.

But this is a cancer blog so on to that...  Right now I am in the period of letting my body recover from radiation/chemo so the surgery can take place.  It occurred to me yesterday that just like they gave me the weekends off from rad/chem this is sort of like that.  A six week period to let my body and mind recover and get ready for another action.

resting on a couch
late Sunday late winter chill
relax for the day

Saturday, a birthday and ice fishing

Well it's a friends birthday and their is an ice fishing tourney in New Gloucester in which my son is going to participate.  I am in Brunswick prepping for the party.  Carole said said she would take me back out to NG so I could say hi to my son.  She just rocks.

I am looking forward to the b-day party tho.

Cancer seems to be doing its cancer thing, not much to say except that I am really grateful to be living in a time when this is just a major inconvenience rather than a death sentence.

cars outside window
engines and tires sounding off
make tracks in the slush

finally another frinday

something a little different.  Created at jacksonpollock.org.  The cancer is not really at the front of my mind right now, except that the surgery looms and I'm not certain that it all gets paid for.  I'm fairly sure that it will all turn out OK tho.

sling some paint around
onto large wall sized pieces
that's what I want done