Tuesday week 5

First off big thanks to everyone who is reading my blog and supporting me. It really helps a lot. It makes me feel so much better. I really appreciate it. Y'all just rock!

So Tuesday. Meet with the radiation dr. day. Tomorrow is go into Portland and meet with the oncologist day.

As this part of the treatment winds down, I have to admit to a certain amount of nervousness as to the next piece. Not so much the wait for the surgery part but afterwards and beyond. I really hope the surgery is successful.

Successful is defined by me not having a permanent colostomy bag and having fully functional sex organs.

thanks to my readers
they support my blog efforts
thank you o thank you

Monday week 5

It's the beginning of the end of the Radiation/Chemo for this round.  My blood work showed that my white count was down to 2 from 2.4.  Low normal is 5.  They have backed of the chemo a little bit.  I am taking 7 pills a day instead of 8.

 I have treatments every weekday up to and including the 9th.  I don't think I'll miss them much.  After rad/chemo I wait for about six weeks to give my body time to heal from the radiation, apparently burning the flesh is tough on the healthy tissue as well as the cancer.  After six weeks I go into the hospital for surgery.

week 5 begins now
chemo meds coursing through me
radiation burns

weekend day 2

So it's about midmorning and once again I went to sleep late but slept in for about 6-7 hours of sleep.  I'm thinking that's pretty reasonable.  Went to my daughter's concert yesterday.  They do very well.  I did question the line up of the pieces a couple of times but all in all I was impressed.

sitting back feet up

keyboard on top of my lap

typing for my blog

It's becoming more and more clear to me that things could be a lot worse.  That is to say if things had to go wrong, I'm glad they are going wrong like this.

weekend day 1

When I was in college there was a period when I complained that the weekends weren't as fun as they used to be.  My roommate pointed out that was because I didn't do anything different on the weekends.  I tended to party a lot in college.  Well that is not true this year.  The weekends just rock.  I'm not poisoning myself with chemo and the radiation is giving me a rest.  Also I nap more.  This weekend I'm going up to hear my daughter play viola in the district two orchestra concert.  Thank you Carole for driving me around.  I've also got a request from a couple of websites to put together an article from this blog.  So far it's turning into a good day.  I win the powerball jackpot tonight and that'll make it just about a perfect day.

strings vibrate sweet sounds
a bow across them just right
sometimes fingers pick.

snowy friday

Still a Friday.  And what does that mean, OH Yeah say it with me.  Weeekend!  Just this day of chemo/rad and then I get a break.  Course if my ride doesn't make it and that's entirely possible cause it's crappy out, the radiation will be bumped out another day, but the chemo won't!

white rainy ice falls
snowy roads hard to travel
winter's cold promise

Thursday

Again not as much sleep as I would have liked but it was solid so it may be OK.  Just waking up now haven't taken the chemo.  Feel pretty good.  Time will tell.  Not much else to report.

sleep leaves my body
my mind rises from its rest
my body not quite

Wednesday

Not feeling tip top today. I didn't get as much sleep as I would have liked and I think I took my anti nausea meds a tad late. On the upside I've lost about 15 pounds since this started. So when this ends I should be quite svelte.

pink floyd in my head
you may feel a little sick
still moving forward

Tuesday early morning. Week 4

Well I got a solid eight hours of sleep last night and feel much better about that.  It's Tuesday so I talk to the radiation oncologist today.  Don't have much to say.  The radiation is doing fine.  The chemo is doing OK.  I'm losing some weight but I've got it to lose.

I discovered Greek Yogurt, blueberries, walnuts, and honey over Christmas.  There may be something to this eating healthy thing after all.  Thank you, Jetti.

Once again I would like to say that I really appreciate the support everyone is giving me during this.  It's good to know it's out there.

tcahf

sky

early morning dark
winter blanket still covers
not quite as cold though

Monday Week 4

Go Pats. Didn't get a lot of sleep last night so I'm a bit tired. The chemo isn't hitting me to hard this morning. A bit but not hideously. Looks like the snow is gonna stay for a while.

nap some then sleep some
small sleeps don't seem to add up
maybe full sleep tonight

Sunday Morning

Have I mentioned I really like the weekends. Appetite comes back no major headaches. I totally recomend weekends. Anyway the snow has stopped. The Patriots are playing this afternoon. Gotta do that lunchtime nap to prepare for the game. It will be interesting to find out if after all this I have more energy. If I've been tired for what seems like forever because I've had a cancer growing inside me.

morning sky is clear
trees covered in winter snow
it is quite chilly

Saturday

So I reached for my chemo meds this morning and smiled, nay grinned, as I remembered that I didn't have to take them. OOH Yeah. It's Saturday. I'm chillin. It's snowing and I'm not outside. I'll prolly take a nap a little later and see how that goes.

snow falls house protects
cold field outside, inside warm
I like my weekends

Another Friday. OOOOH Yeah!

Another week almost done and a weekend sans chemo and radiation approaches.  How cool is that.  I remember liking weekends but not quite this much.

 weekend approaches
unseen knives rest their cutting
I can take a break

Thursday, Nearly halfway done with this round

Just about half of the radiation and chemo for this round of treatments is done.  Nothing really outstanding to report.  I'm really pleased with the people at The Cancer Center at CMMC.  I may have said that before but I can't praise them enough.  Hope you don't have to go through this but if you do in the Lewiston, Maine area, it's an awesome place.

Wednesday and a new feature

So I thought I'd take put up an image once in a while. I'm feeling a little sick this morning so I'm not gonna do much in the way of thoughts but here's a new image for you. You can also find this and many others at my artist page on facebook.

Tuesday

Love to have something pithy here to say but I just don't.  I had hoped that this would get routine and I guess it has.  Lost a little weight.  Being hungry and nauseous at the same time can be a bit weird.  I guess I just carry on.

thanks for your support keep it up.

monday, week 3

UM Go Pats!

Back at it.  The chemo didn't clear my body as readily this weekend as it did last weekend.  That's not to say that I didn't have a a fairly healthy appetite but it was still somewhat diminished.  Spent a fair amount of time asleep but I did manage to stay awake for most of the Pats game.  Thank goodness for afternoon naps.

Still kinda tired.  Still really psyched about the amount of support I'm getting both moral and otherwise from people.  Thanks  and keep it up.

Saturday

not sure why I'm up but there it is.  Coffee is brewing.  I'm working on hungry.  Bit of a headache but I think that may be low blood sugar/no caffeine, I can stop drinking coffee anytime I want,  sure you can.  Anyway Christmas Cove is imminent in a 4 - 5 hour from now with a stop for lunch with the 'rents in Wiscasset kinda way.

All in all things are good right now.  Coffee is beginning to burn.

Update:  Two sips of coffee later and the headache starts to slip away.  A nice knosh would still be nice but that comes a bit later.

OOOOH Yeah! Friday comes again

So another week is finishing up.  I'll spend the weekend in South Bristol with Carole and my folks.  Should be a chillaxing good time.  But first some rad/chemo to finish up for the week.  That's OK it'll go fine.

I heard from my oncologist yesterday.  His office said the cbc blood test had come back a bit low.  Imagine that I'm on rad/chemo and my white count is kinda off.  Who'd a thought it?  Anyway good thing they are tracking it.

Well, it's Friday the 13th, traditionally not my favorite day but I'm sure I'll muddle through somehow.  Turns out that Friday the 13th is followed by Saturday the 14th and who couldn't like that.

feel like bitchin n moanin

But I don't really have much to say.  I mean my feet are cold but that's not new and can be fixed by putting on clean dry sox.  So whose fault is that.  It's snowing which isn't bad in and of itself especially since I don't have anywhere to go today, but it just doesn't excite me.

I saw a vid about Burning Man the other day.  It was about a guys first time there.  What I took away from it was that he spent his time being really psyched and really miserable but in retrospect that it was his choice to feel that way.  That and he couldn't believe that it had taken his friends over a decade to finally talk him into it.

So I guess that's prolly true.  I used to say that unless you have something really horrible to cry about you might as well be happy.  It's just easier that way.  So I guess I'll try taking it a bit easier on myself for a bit.

Thursday snow day, sort of

Well my ride isn't coming today so I have no radiation treatment today.  I still have to do the chemo tho.  I was sorta hoping my oncologist would say something like, "don't bother with your evening dose" or "don't take your Friday evening dose."  But that didn't happen.  I take chemo today but no radiation.

Starting to feel the chemo.  Gonna go take my anti nausea meds.

Wednesday

All is going as planned.  I'm a little sick from the chemo but generally doing well.  Had three medical visits today so it was kind of a busy day for me.  Nothing really extraordinary to report.

later tuesday, looking into nutrition

So I got a call from the nutritionist at my oncologist office.  I had asked about antioxidants.  It turns out that tumeric is being looked at for it's ability to fight cancer.  I like it for it's roll in curry powder.  Green tea was also mentioned but I'm not as big a fan of green tea.  So I'm thinking more curry may be in my future.  I used to keep a huge jar of curry powder with me at all times.  I think I will do that again.

Early Tuesday

Stunning bowel movement last night.  I'm hoping that means that the rad/chemo is working and shrinking the mass a bit.  They took more pictures yesterday and I meet with the radiation oncologist today so we'll see if that's the case or not.

Things are not quite routine yet but headed that way.  I'm taking the anti-nausea med with the chemo in the morning and so far so good, at least today.

Somebody asked me the other day if I was scared when this all started.  I don't remember being scared so much as dazed and confused.  It really happened quickly.  I'm still not scared but I gotta admit I'm not really psyched about the whole surgery thing.  I had a dream last night in which radiation/chemo worked so well that it left only healthy pink tissue behind and they didn't have to cut, just watch for polyps coming back.

later Monday

Geeze, I'm tired.  I may just go to bed sans supper.  Maybe I'll just take a pre-dinner nap.  whatever.  Rad went well.  things are progressing.

Early Monday

Back at it.  I think the chemo gives me headaches as well as nausea.  Gonna have to mention that to doc on Wednesday.  Not much happening.  Took the anti nausea pill along with the chemo this morning.  I'm thinking maybe I should have waited a bit.  But we'll see.  Put up my daily image on Facebook.  Things are going well and I'm looking forward to Friday.

Sunday

Saturday was great.  I had an appetite.  Felt good.  It's nice to have the weekends free of rad/chemo.  I guess the docs really know what they are doing re: that.  Today not much going on.  Slept late, got up at 7 instead of 6.  Went into the bathroom reached for the chemo pills and remembered I didn't have to take them.  Smiled and stuck my tongue out at them.  Childish but their you go.

Big shout out of thanks to Adventures for the Average Woman magazine.  They gave me and my book a mention in their latest tough lit issue.

Not really looking forward to Monday, but I recognize that lot's of people have it worse than I do.  I'm really quite grateful for the good words and support that my friends, family and even people I don't know have shown me.  So keep it up, thanks and I'll try to update my blog in the morning but don't hold your breath.

tcahf
sky

Saturday

First Saturday after first week of rad./chemo.  I get weekends off and I'm really hungry.  I see that as a good thing.  Just finished my morning nap.  Get the first one out of the way ASAP don't you know.  Anyway feels good to not be poisoning myself.

I'm using toilet paper rolls as a visualization aid.  Turns out I have lots of them these days.  Anyway, I stuff one full with the others and as the weeks go by I take them out to show myself that the blockage is getting smaller.

Figure it can't hurt.

Friday WOOHOO!

Finishing up my first week of treatments.  Just gotta take the chemo pills tonight and I'm off them for the weekend.  Darn pleased about that I am.

Actually the week hasn't been that bad.  I was feeling pretty icky and I started taking the meds for icky nausea they gave me and they helped.  Odd how that works.  Still kinda tired.  Plan on much nappage this weekend tho.

The people at CMMC are very supportive.  I am looking forward to seeing what the Dempsey Center has to offer.

Haven't been eating a lot of lunch.  At least not what I used to eat.  Anyway things are moving along.  I've an appt with my oncologist in Portland and my therapist on Wednesday.  Should be an interesting day.

second treatment

Everything seems to be going well.  I can't say for sure but I feel a bit ill after the treatments.  After only two though, I think that may just be me.  I haven't felt any major nausea from the chemo.  I'm pleased about that.

Nothing major to report.  I'll be glad when this is done.

first treatment

Took the first chemo pills this morning when I got up and did the first radiation late morning.  I'm not sure, but I feel sore.  Can that be after one treatment or am I just imagining it.  I hope so cause after five weeks of this, it could suck.

Other than that I'm doing ok.  Good poos in the last twenty four hours.  I'm having a bit of trouble with fiber rich bread which makes sandwiches a bit tough.  

The holiday put a couple of things on hold but I think they'll sort themselves out tomorrow.  I look forward to the time when this gets routine.  Even more when all this is done.